why does breanna love pie? BECAUSE ITS JIMMYS LAST NAME

Q:What do you find in the middle of a pile of dead babies? A:Another dead baby!

Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

What's worse than having a retarded baby? Not having a baby

Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

Why was Jimmy upset? He wasn't.

Why did the Olympic gold-medalist lose his faith in God? Because he began to feel that the the reasoning that most religions were based on was fairly spurious.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the marginal benefit of doing so exceeded the marginal cost.

a piece of string walks into a bar and the bartender says “sorry we dont serve your kind here” so the string goes outside twists himself round and ruffles up one of his ends then walks back into the bar, the bartender says “aren’t you the piece of string i just kicked out?” the string then replies “i’m a frayed knot”

What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

What do you call a girl who disappears on the 3 May 2007? Madeleine McCann

Why did thw chicken cross the road? Because his parents died.

MATH: if for every 1 minute for billy is 5 minutes and every 5 minutes is an hour than billy is on acid and needs to come down.

Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

THUMBS THIS DOWN AND I WILL KILL YOU! TOTAL PEOPLE DIED FROM THUMBING THIS DOWN: 147289347809237489

A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

How did the man open the car? He opened in.

Why didn't the boy get his mom anything for her birthday? He was killed by a drunk driver years ago

Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

why aren't black people real? they are. just because they are less visible at night makes no difference.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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