How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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What did the mouse say to the elephant that sat on him? Nothing, he died on impact.

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"Why can't you hear pterodactyl when it goes to the bathroom?" "Because the pee is silent?" "No, because they are dead, you idiot."

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What do you call a really bad band? One with a poor guitar player, a bad bass player, sloppy drums, obnoxious vocals, and all of the songs sound the same. Or Nickelback.

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Q: Whats different about pizza and jewish people? A: Pizzas don't scream in the oven.

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Whats green and has white spots? Idk im asking you

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what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

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Oooh. That fish smells delicious.

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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the awkward moment when a sentence doesnt end the way you think it octopus

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I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

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Penis

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Why was the young child dead in the middle of the road? His mother wasn't there to prevent him from chasing the ball across the road, and therefore, he ran in front of a truck

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What do a grape and an airplane have in common? They both have wings! except not the grape.

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sorry, that was a really bad joke, joking just joking, of course we can chat later, you got something in particular to do?

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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What do u call a six year old boy holding a gun. illegal

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What's red and green and goes round and round? A kilt at a scottish dance

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What did the White lady say to the Black lady? Hello, how are you?

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roses are gay s is justin beber s are u justen beber eats crap

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You know why no ones tried to kill Obama ? Picture him in an escalade!

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? She had no arms

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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