Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A Stick!

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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why are jews so cash hungry? because like the rest of us they are looking for a way to survive and feed their family.

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What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

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How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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I read my Uncle an anti-joke. He is still wondering why it made no sense to him.

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Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died

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Whats black and blue and doesnt bruise? a bruise.

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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A jew a muslim and a catholic walk into a doctors office. The doctor is arrested for raping a child and his office closes. The Jew and Muslim find another doctor andthe Catholic dies because he had aids

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My grandmother's zodiac sign was cancer, and she was killed by a giant crab.

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What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

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3 Blondes walk into a bar. One ducks, the other two are hospitalized with mild concussions

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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I like my coffee the way I like my women.....without a penis.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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A blindman walks into a bar... then a chair, then a pole

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A blind man, a black man and a rabbi walk into a bar. The blind man trips violently.

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What do you call a gay mexican on welfare? poor

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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Hey girl, are you from Jamaica? Cus ja makin me go temporarily insane.

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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