A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

What's brown and slimy? brown slime

What do you call a needy person? A person whos needs need needs.

I banged your mom so hard that she got a urinary tract infection.

Q: Why do police men keep killing unarmed black men? A: I don't know.

Why did the black man cross the road? To get to the other ____?

person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

What's similar about a black person and a white person? They're both black, apart from the white person

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

What's green, [ THIS BIG ] and flies around the room... A remote controlled gherkin!

Are you made out of silicon, because you are silly and your name is Con.

How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff. What's green and fluffy? Green fluff. What's red and fluffy? A kitten that got hit by a truck.

What is pink and gets wet a tounge

It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

A man walks into a bar and says ouch.

What did the man say to the tree? Nothing, he was a mime.

chinga tue madre Ryan

Knock, Knock? Who's There? Not Suzie

did you stub your toe?

This is funny.

what is red with 2 legs? half a cat

Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was tired of working for the man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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