What is black, white, and red all over? something that just so happens to be seen by the color blind.

What did the apple say to the Banana? ....Nothing... fruit don't talk

When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

Say this really fast. Ice Bank Mice Elf It'll take a while for dumbasses to understand.

Paul Walker: Breaks, stop Breaks: No

-Knock Knock -Who's there? -George. -George Who? -George Carpenter, Remember? We were in the same class in third grade. -Come on in!

How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

Whats brown and ryhmes with Snoop? Dr. Dre.

What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

How do Asians name their children? They throw them down the stairs and see what sound they make.

A bar walks into a man

welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

Why was the young girl sad? A doctor told her that due to the fact that she was recently raped, she contracted AIDS.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Hey, does this smell like chloroform to you?

Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Waiter, there is a hydrogen conducting carbon nanotube in my soup. That is part of the special, sir.

jeffrey: Do you know what happened on the 5th of november? gerald: No jeffrey: I cant remember

Guy 1: why are you such a douche? Guy 2: cause douches get the most p***y

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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