what makes the world go round? An axis (just jokin, its COFFEE)

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Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

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What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

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How do you confuse an idiot? By confusing an idiot.

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How can you help Sally who is casually gets beaten by her farther every day? Just give £3 a month to the NSPCC

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Q:Why didnt the stoner go to college? A:Because he died of lung cancer.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Your mother is so white that when she goes to the beach she has to wear sunscrean to avoid being badly sun burned.

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Justin's life

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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What's Funny About A Black Man Being Shot? Nothing, That Man Was My Friend.

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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Whats white and black and red all over? A panda that has just been shot by a poacher.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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When life gives you lemons, you make grape juice and let the world wonder how you made it.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane..."

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A man goes to the till of a 7-11 to buy a 12-pack of condoms. "Busy night?" asks the cashier boldly. The man complains to the store's manager about the cashier's misconduct and she is given a formal warning.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm a paranoid schizophrenic And so am I

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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