why was the man walking in the kitchen? idk thats why i asked

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Why was the broom late? Cause he overSWEPT!!! ahahahahahaha!

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"My dog doesn't have a nose" "How does it smell?" "It can't. It bled to death."

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What's worse, a dead baby or an abortion? A dead baby on a bayonet

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You know why the economy is so bad? Years of giving into corporations instead of local business. This moves the profits to the owner of the company instead of mom and pop who will be giving it back to the local community.

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Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

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i died. new product by steve jobs

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

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Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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Q: What did the tree say as he fell? A: Studies have shown plants in general do not have a voice box, thus making plants incapable of speaking.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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wanna hear a joke? yes

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Why did the girl have twins she was raped

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What did the orange say to the lemon? "Hello"

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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