Hey I just met you, and this is crazy! But iI'm on bath salts and your face looks tasty!

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A man walks into a bar, then he leaves and goes home

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Your momma's so fat in her history class they wrote down what they were doing

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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Hi

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Roses are red violets are blue hes for me not for you if by chance you take my place ill take my fist and smash your face

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Why did danielle drop her ice cream cone? Because she was diabetic and had a blood sugar of 5.

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How do you make an electrician fall over? You hit him hard with a lamp

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Apirl showers bring... Tornadoes that kill families

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

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Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

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dude... what would you do if i punched you in the face? i would pee on you

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How do you find out how many Mexicans are living in the United States? Take a Census.

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What did the duck wear to go swimming? A bathingsuit!

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They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

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A woman catches her husband cheating on her she divorces him in a rather lengthy sequence of meetings in court

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How long does it take a woman to park a car? Shouldn't take long, depends on the size of the parking spot.

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Q:Why didn't Mr. Fuzzy have to cut his hair anymore? A: Because he was diagnosed with cancer

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Statistically 9/11 Americans wont get this joke. But 7/7 British will.

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Whats the difference between a dead baby and a porsche? i don't have i dead baby in my garage. That would be wrong

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If Michael Jackson were alive today, what would he be doing? Scratching at the top of his coffin.

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Why did the mexican cross the road? His drugs were on the other side.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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