Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

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roses are red and have big balls woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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where did Lucy go when the bomb dropped? everywhere.

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A Sloth runs...

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What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

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meh

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What do you get if you mix razor blades with babies? An erection.

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what can you give to a millionaire to make him happy? sex

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*Knock knock! "Who's there?" "Jehovah's witness" .....

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Hey. I have to ask you a serious question. Okay. what? You can only answer with yes or no. Okay what is it? Do your parents know your gay? .....

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why did the kid drop his ice cream? because he got ran over by a bus! (not a original, just funny)

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead.

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Printing billions of counterfeit dollars...in ones.

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How do you kill a blonde? You shoot them in the head with a revolver.

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A French man gets into a fight

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What do you call Mary in a wheelchair ... virgin mobile

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because while he was swinging, his friends dared him to jump off and called him a chicken when he didn't. Still hesitant, he tried to jump off, but his arm caught on the swing chain and he fell face first into the tanbark. He needs reconstructive surgery to repair his face.

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What's worse than a dead baby falling out of a tree? Two dead babies stapled together falling out of a tree.

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Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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Knock knock? Who's there? Llama. Llama who? Llamas aren't racist unlike that bastard Ann Coulter. That's why they can get a carrot up the ass and she can't.

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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Bob: Hey Jim, what's up? Jim: Obviously the sky, oh and i see a few planes too. by the way why are you asking me why don't you just look up?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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