A horse walked into a bar and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?" The horse then replied, "Well my wife is dying of cancer, my mother is a drug addict, and my two kids are in the hospital for 3rd degree burns."

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What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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A cow was very inconveniently standing in the middle of a golf course. An alligator dragged the cow into a swamp. The cow dies

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What's the difference between peanut butter and jelly ? Among many things, one is made with peanut butter, the other with fruits.

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Q: What happens when your name is Gretchen Wieners? A: Nothing. your last name is a male sex organ

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What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

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Q: What did zero say to the eight? A: Nice belt

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A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

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Q. what did the kid say to his foreign language teacher about the test? A: i dont understand this test, its like in a complete different language

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hi do you like guitars? cool i dont

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead.

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Why did Martin go to school with no pants on? Because he had no legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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Women's Rights.

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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P1 : Yo mamma's so fat... P2: My moms dead

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What's black and red and can go through time. I don't know but you have cancer and are going to die very soon.

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How do you scare a 5 year old girl? Stick your dick out.

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Roses are red Violets are fin I'll be the 6 You be the 9

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What time is the dentist appointment? Time for you to get a watch

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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If I had a gun with only 2 bullets, and was in a room with Hitler, Osama Bin Laden, and you; i would shot Hitler and Osama because they committed terrible crimes

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A Jew walks into a bar. It probably hurt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops