Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

How do you turn a broken skateboard into a gleaming Rolls Royce? With magic.

a fat black man walks into an aquarium he was quickly shot down because he was mistaken for a whale.

Q: Why was the duck hands down hilarious? A: It wasn't, ducks don't have hands and with human beings able to be equipped with emotions such as to see an object or living organism as funny, do not view these mammals in a humorous manner.

What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

What's the Capitol of Washington dc? W

Roses are red, Sometimes they're thorny, When I'm around you, I get kind of Horny

without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

i want to eat a horse out jaffa cake

If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

A guy walks into a bar. He puts an icepack on his head so it doesn't swell, and decides to go out for a drink. He walks into a bar and thinks to himself, "that's twice today, maybe I should just go home."

Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

Whats the difference between a car and a dead child? I don't have a dead baby in my basement.

yo mama is so fat that they call her fat mama

What number comes after 29? 30.

Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

What do you call a black person with a million dollars? A millionaire.

One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a water because he's the designated driver

Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

2 people with ADD are playing baseball. One of them pitches to the other guy and the other guy swings his arms around, misses, then gets hit by a baseball bat. The batter then realized he was the pitcher and the other guy has gone off chasing after a bird that just flew by.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

Why did the two men kiss? Because they were both homosexual and attracted to members of the same sex.

Your mom is so fat, that it causes great concern for her family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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