Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Has anyone else noticed that the very least popular and the most popular anti-joke on this site are both related to the Holocaust.

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What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

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Yo mamma's so stupid, she couldn't get a high paying job and had to settle for working full time at McDonalds, just to get your family through the week.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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What do you get when you cross a crocodile and a couch? A coat because vests don't have sleeves.

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what is blue and fuzzy? Blue Fuzz

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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If i had 100 dollars for every time a black president was assainted i would have 100 dollars in 4 months and six days.

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

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Me and my family won courtside tickets to the World Finals basketball game! ...WNBA...

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What's the new green? Green

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Whats The difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash And one is a watermelon

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Brain fart

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Q. What did the dead man do after he died? A. Nothing. He's dead.

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What did the angry man with tourette syndrome say when he smashed his thumb with a hammer? Ouch.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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the sky is green no it is not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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