What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

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Your momma is so short, she needed my help to reach something off the top shelf.

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a black guy, a handicap, a pervert, and a fat guy are sitting in at a booth in a bar... Your watching family guy

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Knock knock Who's there? Hi I'm John from the jehovah witness society down the street and I'd love to talk to you about your beliefs! Would you like a pamphlet?

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Q: How many Jews can fit in a car? A: 5 in a standard mid sized sedan, or 7 in an SUV

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

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"knock Knock" "Who's there?" "The SS, we heard you are smuggling jews in your attic, so you are coming with us."

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How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Not Harry Styles! - Louis

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Why is the black guy jobless? He's 3 years old.

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What did the aliens say when they first landed on planet Earth? We've come back for Anthony Davis.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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What do you call an Arab guy flying a plane? A pilot.

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding Osama Bin Ladan in your refrigerator.

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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What do you call someone with no body and no nose? Nobody nose.

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A Nazi walks into a bar. No one really knows he's a Nazi and he doesn't talk about it that much in public, so he chats to some people then leaves after a few beers...

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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A: knock knock A: knock knock knock... A: door bell

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Hi I am Michael Jackson... you have any young boys? My park is open :), the "nude dark caverns" can be scary, but I accompany them all, so relax. Moral: LEAVE MJ ALONE! ;(

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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