What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

Whats the difference between a Philadelphia Flyers fan and a pedophile? What they are.

Wanna hear something irrational? Pi

What did the douche bag get for Christmas? Your girlfriend.

What did the white man do when he got a black eye? He thanked the gracious african-descented donor, and with a little luck he just might see his beautiful wife and kids again

Why did chuck norris die Brain tumor

What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

How many lemurs does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them Why did Jane fall off the swing She has no arms Why did Jack drop his ice cream cone He got hit by a bus Did you know that if you pretend to eat salt you can actualy taste it Do this in public. Why was 6 afraid of 7 Numbers can't think This is the original anti joke A man walked into a bar he is an alcoholic and is distroying his family. Fin a penny pick it up and all the day you will have good luck Until you get hit with a car door. A man is SCUBA diving when he is almost out of air so he takes one breath an holds it to the surface The trip is so long that his lungs explode do to a change in pressure so he died.

Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

Why did the black guy have a bunch of marihuana? He was the owner of a shop that sold it for medical purposes.

What's the differences between oranges? Trees don't have doors.

Q. What's short and black A. A little black kid

What happened when the dinosaur walked into a lake? It got wet

Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: 7 is a registered sex offender.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

What's the best way to get high without doing drugs? Jump.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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