Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

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What's worse than a pile of dead babies A live one eating its way out!

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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Whats worse than Lindsey Lohans vagina? Nothing.

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What's black, white, and red all over? That could describe any number of objects.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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There is a famous joke, "What's black and white and re(a)d all over? A newspaper!" However, this is not featured on this website. Why? Because this is anti-joke.com, not joke.com - you moron

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It's not just a boulder. It's a rock! A rooooocckk!

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I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

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What is more disappointed the Lake Disappointment? You

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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Tilt your screen back

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chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

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whats sad about a ton of blacks in a limo going off a cliff. they'll destroy the car

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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why did Lucy fall down? she got hit with a hammer

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two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

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A man goes to a petting zoo. He sees a zookeeper wrestling a bear. The bear kills the zookeeper and escapes from it's cage. It promptly mauls the rest of the staff and visitors at the zoo until it is shot by local police.

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Why didnt the man make it to work? Because he was in a fatal car accident.

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A priest, a pedophile and a rapist walk into a bar. He orders a drink.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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