what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

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PENIS

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What's brown and white all over? Chad butthole

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A guy walks into a bar. NOT!

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Black people stink of shite!

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The closest I've been to an animal charity was when I walked past it to by myself a fur coat

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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How do you get Helen Keller to keep a secret? You politely ask her not to tell anyone.

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What's the difference between toilet paper and a shower curtain? So YOU'RE the one!

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What happens when your school teacher gives you homework over the break? You give your teacher homework too!

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guess what I'm going to Spain on my holidays

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Knock Knock Who's there? (Pause) Who's there? Hello? Bloody kids

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What did the little kid say to the stranger? Nothing. He was taught not to talk to strangers.

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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What do you get when you cross a rusty nail and a foot? Tetanus

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A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his failing marriage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops