Once there was a girl named Andrea

When Gronkowski spikes the ball, 20 children die.

What is worse than you commiting suicide? the many years of mourning and threapy your loved ones may have to go though

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

What's worse than getting punched in the balls? Many things inflict more pain than that

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Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

What's the difference between a black cat and a black cat? Nothing.

What did the smoker say when he coughed? Ohhh dam it's turned into a smokers cough

You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

A black man got sentenced go prison for stealing a car. He didn't do it.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

Why did the monkey cross the road? It didn't. It died!

How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

What do you calk a couple of friends hanging out? An intimate get-together.

Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: *Leaving the cinema* Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

How many Jews does it take to bake a turkey using an oven, I don't know but it only takes one Jew to stuff one.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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