Why did the teacher arrive late for class? Because his father had a stroke the night before, and they had to rush to the hospital and because of exhaustion, he missed the bus, and arrived ten minutes late.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

What do chickens, pictures and babies have in common? Nothing.

What Do You Call A Black Guy Surrounded By Nine White Guys With Bats? Jackie Robinson.

When Miley Cyrus sticks out her tongue, people usually are there to take a photograph.

a man goes for blood check up ..........his whole hand was frozen >>>>the doctor cuts his finger'''''' he comes outside crying n sits in a chair n cries.............]]]]]] the person near him asks him why is he cryin...he says i came 4 my blood test the doctor cut my finger.the person next to him cried aloud......the person asked y r u cryin>>>>>>>>>>i came her 4 my urine test ..........????????lol

Those last 4 were by: Walter

roses are red violets are blue i done you mom a favor by making you...banana and rice don't worry it'll taste just nice

What do you call the black guy with a gun a ski mask on? Tyrone, because thats his name.

Why did 'Mister Love' get arrested? Clue: One of the most ironic things ever You can guess

Your mother is so old, she could easily be considered a senior citizen.

How do you know if you have a good slave? It is hard working and determined... And black

Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: he was sucidal because his kids hate him and his wife cheated on him.

What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

How do you get babys to paint a house? depends on how hard you throw them

how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

Q: Whats the worst thing to drop in a prison shower? A: An exploding nail gun

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

why was the stone green? I dont know thats why im asking -_-

Lol, first of all all I watched was something called Chobits many years ago, and while I know what hentai is, I cant say I watch that a lot or not really at all no... A peek but, its just too weird for me, they all look like cute kids with deformed bodies or something. What? You into Nerds now? Why cant I just wear my contacts and look somewhat less alien?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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