What happened to the guy that took to many lunesta pills? He fell asleep but he was glad it was the weekend or he would have been late for his job

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What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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Two polar bears are sitting in a hot tub. One polar bear asks the other to pass the soap. The other responds, "No soap, radio!"

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okay so one time my dog was eating an octopus tail and i was all like...Bro! octopus are our friends dont eat them! then he was all like okay...so later i saw my goldfish eating a blue kangaroo and i was all like bro blue kangaroos are our friends dont eat them and she was all like okay.. so then i saw my sandwich eating itself and i was like bro...let me eat you instead! and it was like okay. then i saw a bear eating you so i was like bro....thats all i said before it ate both of us :( and thats the story of why i have 6 toes on my left buttcheek

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What's worse then an adult dying A baby dying

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky, It hit one of the random green pipes.

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this site is an antijoke

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Why was the washing machine laughing? Because you're on drugs.

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Leaves are green, You should know all this by now...

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left him.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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The name "Hunter Barksdale".

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How many girls does ittake to screw in a lightbulb? Doesnt matter as long as dinner is on the table by 6:00

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Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Me too.

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Dolly Parton's bobbs are so fake that they both have silicone in them.

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Why did the scarecrow win the nobel prize? Cos he was out standing in his field!

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How you know when dislextic

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Roses are red Violets are blue I don't like poems What rhymes with poem?

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What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas, therefore nothing

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What's the difference between Futurama and One Direction? Futurama only has one bender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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