Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What did the guy and girl do at the wedding? Nothing, The guy is gay

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

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Q. Why did the Chineese man eat a banana? A. He was hungry, and he was craving a banana.

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Vaginas are like? books. You stick your dick in them.

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You know what likes to get fisted? Sock puppets.

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why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

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brittney griner

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Face down, ass up. Thats the way I like to sleep

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Once upon of time there was a chicken. It crossed the road and everybody made fun of him. The End

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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Why don't elephants smoke? Because they would be afraid of the fire, and they are much more adversely affected by recreational drugs than humans are.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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today at school... I learned about all the core subject plus the additional electives.

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Why weren't the two gays invited to the office party? Because there is no office party until december, therefor no one was invited.

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She look like Ms. Universe and I'm bout to be in that black hole

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what did the orange say to the other orange? we are both oranges.

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What's funnier A Ginger or a fat kid A fat ass ginger

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus because he had ice cream.

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops