What kind of a prediction is THAT?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar He drinks the night away with his friends *Plot Twist* It was a dream He has no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walks into a bar... he is blind so it isn't funny

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? wanna go ride bikes?

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

You know what me and Bill Cosby have in common? Katie..

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Do you love me? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Did you hear about the guy with five penises? Me neither, because that sounds like a very improbable aberration.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happens when you catch a cold? You sneeze whenever you stand up.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call 4 black men in a BMW? Successful Businessmen.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How many baby's does it take to paint a wall Depends on how hard you throw them

thumb_up thumb_down +5

what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A girl walks into a supermarket. She picks up a banana, a can of soup, and a loaf of bread. She then walks up to the cash register to pay. The cashier looks at her and the items she has and says, "I can tell you're single." She smiles and responds, "How do you know that?" He says, "Because you're ugly."

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops