Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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What did the mute say to the deaf man?

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Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

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Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on?

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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"One day this man walks out of his house to go to work. He sees this snail on his porch. So he picks it up and chucks it over his roof, into the back yard. Snail bounces off a rock, cracks its shell all to ****, and lands in the grass. Snail lies there dying. But it doesn't die. It eats some grass. Slowly heals. Grows a new shell. And after a while it can crawl again. One day the snail up and heads back to the front of the house. Finally, after a year, the little guy crawls back on the porch. Right then, the man walks out to go to work and sees this snail again. So he says to it, 'What the f uck's your problem?'" -Training Day

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Knock, Knock? Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Why are you crying? I'm not crying. Oh.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

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A man walks into a bar and poops his pants. He left because of the embarrassment.

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What is my name? I dont know

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If I have a penny, and I give it to Michael Jackson, What will he do with it? Nothing. He's dead.

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how do you make a black person stop drowning you take your boot of his head

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*Knock knock* I thought no one was home so I left... Turns out my grandma hung herself

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Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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What did the white father tell his mexicon son and his wife as he left for work bye

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your girlfriend is so dumb she is clinically retareded

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Why is Timmy a dumbass ? He's not, because asses cannot, by definition, be intelligent, so it is unnecessary to qualify it as "dumb".

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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What do you call a muslim flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Q: Why did the cow cross the road? A: Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops