a man walks into a bar the other man ducks

Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

Chuck Norris once starred in a movie with Bruce Lee.

What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

You see this dick stop being a spick now suck on my wee wee u prick

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

Who has fair skin, blonde hair and is African? Stefan.

that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

Q:What do you get when you mix a tiger and a panda? A:nothing, its impossible

I bought my daughter the Josef Fritzl advent calendar. The proceeds go towards abuse survivor charities.

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

dildos are red, vaginas are blue, mother, what have I done to you?

What's worrying about a middle-eastern man on a plane? The fact you are worrying about it.

What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

Dad: sussy, do you know how you were made? Sussy: No, how? Dad: With this DICK!!

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

Yo momma so stupid when I said drinks are on the house she went and got a ladder

Lillie: tell me three adjectives that would describe yourself. Ellie: pretty, smart, and funny. Lillie: if I were to analyze you...I would say you are pretty, smart, and funny.

Whats fuzzy and greenand if it falls from a tree it will kill you? A pool table.

What do Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder have in common? They're both well known figures who have inspired many.

How many Mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? The entire population.

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

Went to a zoo there was a asian shouting GOOZILLA at the reptile house I said no 2 frickly pickles please He said helwo I'm wo pong th pow wice to weet you I said does he come with subtitles Old priest said no the said hello little boy want a mint I said oh thanks I'm not a boy I'm 19 Old priest said no no you can't have one of my special mints I said wait those mints have R's on them are the rainbow mints Old priest no there raspberry I said ok don't be a stranger Old priest said oh I will I said wait your THE PRIEST He said oh I'm just a priest looking for little boys I said no your dead now jumped 30 feet in the air sat on a bird dove into him bird went threw him we made a team promised to clean the world of evil only to find out that we killed the mother of all priest Bird said tweak tweak I said yeah let's hunt them all down Shall the be a part 2 you decide

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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