Scene:restraunt Me:can I have a coke please? Waiter:sorry we don't have any, is Pepsi ok? Me:is monopoly money ok?

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Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

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What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

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Q: When is the best date to walk out your door in New York? A: 9/11

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hey bill!

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A Frenchman stays and fights

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

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What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

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What really puts a kick into both my life and the lives of others around me? My leg(s) of which recieves messages from a sophisticated bundle of "wires" in my cranium that enables it to act at all.

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your brother so fine that hes skinney

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names! *ba dum chzz*

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for keeps?

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A mexican Police officer walks into a crime scene. "Ouch." he exclaims, rubbing his forehead where a red bump is already surfacing.

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A black guy walks into a shoe store and buys a pair of size 14 shoes. The cashier smiles and says: so is it true what they say about big feet? The black guy laughs for a moment and responds: yeah it's really hard to find socks that fit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

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What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

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*insert joke here*

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you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

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YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

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Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

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call 803-389-9808 for a good time ;D

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Kendall and Nick Fredick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops