What do you call a man that goes to work every day to provide for his family? A spoon

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. why did the refridgerator fall out of the tree? Because it wanted to be a monkey? Why did the John fall out of the tree? Because he has no arms and legs because he suffers from a severe case of lepracy. Why did Timmy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by three monkeys, a fridge and a boy with no limbs.

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What's the difference between a table lamb? A fishing pole, automobiles are very useful

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Goku: KAAAAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE Freezebox: HOLY SHI... Narrator: Will Goku ever finish his attack? Will Freezebox stand there like a fucking bitch afraid for the next 48 damn epiodes rather than take a step to the side? Will the "Zee" fighters ever do anything else but comment the trucking obvious and stop aborting the show with their sweat? Find out in the next episode of... Moral: DRAGONBULL ZHIT!

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A: Have you ever heard of a blue waffle? B: Yes, i eat them every morning... A: DO you REALLY know what a blue waffle is? B: Yes...

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Your mama's teeth are so yellow... She should think about scheduling an appointment at a local dentist's office.

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women's rights

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What happens when you are a fat 37 year old virgin, with a small penis, poor bone structure, pale skin, a horrible personality, and no friends? You spend all night writing anti-jokes...will someone please like me?

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What do you call a fat guy falling down stairs Japan suffering.

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Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, Whose body parts were all adequate and thus could not perform any odd sexual acts upon himself.

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what did the mexicans name their daughter? nothing. they were deported before they had a chance

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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Your Momma's So fat, that she is quite unhealthy, and she should stop spending her life savings at fast food restaurants. Probably should stop drinking pop as well.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Jews don't celebrate Christmas

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Nothing because saying a fish can talk is like saying Obama is a good president.

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sooo.how do you get a bonner when your in a room with lady gaga???? you tell lady gaga to turn around and you think of brittany spears bending over get it nahhh probably not

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Roses are ??red Vilotes are ????blue I am single and now so are u???? no go move on I don't need u I have some weed and I'm willing to kill u

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Why did the boy drop his Ice cream? A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him.

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There are 263 birds on a fence, a farmer shot 1 how many are left? 0 the rest flew away.

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why did the man fall over he was a loaf of bread

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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