I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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what do black men and vending machines have in common? neithier work and they both steal your money

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How do you get a baby out of a blender? Pour it.

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roses are red violets are blue i shouldnt be on this cause im in class

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Biggest lie ever told... Mrs. Beiber, its a boy.

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your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

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how do you get a taco? Buy one!

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- Why a black man can not jump? - Because he broken his leg.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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Why cant penguins fly? because they cant

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

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You have 5 $1 dollar bills. Your mom rapes you and you still have 1 $5 dollar bill.

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Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

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Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

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Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

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Roses are red, violets are blue and the sun is very hot

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What's worse than this joke? Taking a dump on an airplane as it crashes in to the World Trade Center.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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Whats more crazy? Stabbing someone or killing someone? I don't know thats why I am asking you

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What do you call a black man in an envelope? A tiny black man

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What is better than a car made of gold? Anything you consider to be better than a car made of gold.

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in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

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What did the blind man get for Christmas? Poison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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