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Me: Hey Chris! Chris: WTF.u.c.k

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is both blind and deaf, and doing so would put others in danger.

Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

What's worse than the Holocaust? A worm in your apple.

dyslexics of the world untie!

How are black people and apples the same They both hang from trees

Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

yo momma is so stupid, she probably in in the bottom 1% of her age group

We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

what did the man say when he was reading a book? nothing, if u assume the situation when hes reading to himself.

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

Your mom says hi!.........Jinks!!!! yeah yeah yeah yeah yeaaaah.

What happen to the man who got drunk and passed out behind the wheel? He crashed into a tree, his car caught fire and then he got incinerated.

Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

You are the most beautiful person in the world.

Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

How do chinese name their kids? They drop silverware

Why do Jew's have long noses? To dig out of the ashes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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