What does a chocolate bar and a dolphin have in common? Nothing

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Killing people is not illegal just ask a soldier

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

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Yo momma is so stupid that she walked off a cliff.

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How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

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Ashton Kutcher meets a fine cougar at a bar and the cougar fatally wounded his throat.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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what do you call Tim Tebow on a bike with a clown hat on? Tim, Mr. Tebow whatever you want

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why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender say, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here." The man continues to order a drink when he realises the comment was directed at the elephant standind behind him.

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Okay lord and master, now get lost, I am trough with you, I have other things to get done, XD My nose is so itchy XD

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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Why should you never shower with a pokemon? Pokemon is a game for children. In doing so you would greatly disturb your child who is quite fond of pokemon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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