the mean terrorist said "i am going to kill your mother" that mother is now dead

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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A grandma writes to her young grandson every day over e-mail with funny lines and pictures,He shows his parents a joke she sent him it reads- "A guy walks into a bar.. He says ouch" They then read on and call the police.They say "Son go to your room.. you're being stalked by a pedophile.. Your grandma has been dead since last year.. we are sorry"

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In the North people say "once upon a time." What do people in the South say? "Y'all never gonna believe dis shit!"

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What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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The verification for this post was debatable: "Which of these does not belong?" George Bush Barack Obama Bill Clinton Ronald Reagan Head of Cabbage Answers on a postcard please... [L]

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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Your momma is so fat, her doctor recommended exercising more and eating healthier.

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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Why couldn't Horton hear a who? He was a loaf of bread.

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anus

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A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

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Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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steve walked into a bar, what happened next? A: He fell down.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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what do poor black guy and poor white guy have in common..................................................... their poor

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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