Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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How do you get a one-armed Polak out of a tree? Get him a ladder and help him down.

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Horse walks into a bar. Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from. So, you should probably leave.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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WHY ARE WOMEN SO HARD TO SLEEP WITH? Because the men are always hard while sleeping with them

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

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How do you know when it's hot outside? When you walk oside and it's hot.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

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What do you call a fake noodle An impasta

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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There were two planes to take off.. One did, the other not at all..

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A Jew, a Catholic, and an Aeithiest walk into a bar. The bartender look at them and says "Is this some kind of a joke?".

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: Immobile.

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Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

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Why did the black guy get hit by a banana He was low on potassium and his friend threw the banana too hard

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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