So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

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what did Shivank say to Ricky? "you suck dick" HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What did the librarian say at the heavy metal concert? Shhhhh

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Roses are Green Violets are Black Everything's different since I took crack

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Why didn't Jesus like Pizza? Because Pizza doesn't exist.

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I got into an argument with my friend the other day. He contested that the onion was the only food that could make you cry, so I beat his wife to death with a coconut,

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

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What do you call a person who is black? A black person.

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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the sky is green no it is not

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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A man walks off a bus. How did he get on top of it in the first place?

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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Why did the rabbit cross the road? He was attempting vehicular suicide after being told yet again that he was "silly" and "Trix are for kids."

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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