Three men walked into a bar the other one ducked. SI

What happened to the twins? 9/11

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

NEVER

A genie walks into a bar. The bartender asks for three wishes. The genie says "okay". The bartender says "I wish I was the richest person in the world." The genie says "okay." Then He woke up

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he got hit by a car because he wasn't aware of the dangers of not looking both ways. Bufoon

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If I Had A Brick I Would Throw It At You

Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

How do prevent a black man from robbing your house? Lock you doors and perhaps get an up-to-date security system.

Why did Suzy drop her ball? Because roughly 5 years ago she was part of a car crash violently tearing off both of her arms. Knock knock. Who's there. NOT SUZY!

Q: How many Jews does it take to fix a light bulb? A: 2, one to hold the light bulb and the other to turn the ladder

So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

GO CHARLIE TO CANDY MOUNTAIN. Charlie is a unicorn and unicorns are not real they are mythological creatures. They do not breath becuase they where never alive unless you do drugs(mr craig) that is the only way to see them. And drugs leed to lose of money, loss of money = broke.Broke = no home. No home= death. So who believes in unicorns??

In your case, maybe because it is time to stop thinking so much, and begin living life, if the world cannot appreciate a wise man such as yourself, maybe that man should stop being wise, and begin being happy.

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

The Lord said to John: "Go forth and receive eternal life" But John went fifth... So he won a toaster

what are you your not a human? are you an other?

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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