Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

Jax vs Pig Jax: HOHAHOHOHAHOHAHOHA... Etc Pig *spinning head like neck is gonna break off* Shao Kahn: FINISH HIM! Jax: GOT YA! OH YEAH... BEASTIALI*Y, BEAST*ALITY? AGAIN?

What did the pedophile say to the delightfully curly-headed youth? Can I have fries with that?

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

How come Billy can only swim in circles? His right arm and right leg were amputated because he scraped his left arm.

Based on every event that ever happened on Earth, where is a terrorist most likely to plant a bomb? Site B. Many more people play CS:GO than attempt to bomb any real-world location. Site A is a close second.

How do you kill Osama Bin Laden? Get The Navy Seals To Infiltrate his compound.

G:nock nock B:come in!

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

Who is yellow and cant drive straight. A man dying of lukemia

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

What did the deaf person see? He was blind too, so he didn't see anything.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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