Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

Roses are red. Violates' are blue. Hitler is my homy.

roses are red violets are blue i'm allergic to pollen achoo

What's white and looks like paper? Paper

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

Q: Why do circles make such good friends? A: They don't. They're shapes and there cannot have friends

I LOVE MASTURBAITING ALL DAY!!!!

What's worse than an hours detention? Gettind raped by a horse anally.

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

You're so fake, Barbara Millicent Roberts is jealous of you.

Wanna hear a good joke? Sure. So does Hellen Keller

why is there art classes so people can make beautiful pieces of art :)

Why did the dinosaurs die out? This is a long and debated subject, and as no one was alive back then and no solid evidence has been found to support any theories we can only wait.

A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

A woman woke up next to her husband that was already awake. She said "F*** you" and walked out of the house. On the other side of the world, a horse is giving birth to a chihuahua.

Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

why was the boy sad? his bellybutton hurt

What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

how do you fit 100 jews in a mini ? two in the front, two in theback and 96 in the ash tray

why was six afraid of seven It wasnt. numbers are not sentient or tangible and thus are incapable of feeling fear

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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