Roses are red, my name is Dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave

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What's worse than one cat stuck in a tree? Getting raped

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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Why is elmo sad? He was brutally raped by Dora :D

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven.

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What did the clown say when he was denied health insurance? Nothing, he died of his pre-existing heart condition.

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

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What separates man from animal? Divorce.

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What is more annoying then finding a worm in your apple you

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hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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Black, I dont know if you are kidding around or something, but I cant reach you on the phone pal, I am really sorry about the Valium, it was like only 10 milligrams pal, I mean please man, it was a joke, and Ill break up with Line anyways, I mean Alex and Petter are sorry too okay? Just take the phone, ill be there soon, I mean come on, you are the most cruel person I know, lets talk about it

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball? Because he would scare the shit out of everyone, and come to think of it wasn't even sure he had been invited.

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How many Obamas does it take to screw an economy? What do you think?

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Q: Wy couldn't the T-rex grab the other Dinosor? A: Because he is extinct.

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What would you call the baby of an elephant and a rhinoceros? Nothing. They are two entirely different species and therefore cannot breed.

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Whats red and hurts your teeth? A brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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