Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

roses are red violets are blue daffodils are yellow pansies are pink

thumb_up thumb_down -10

When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the man read the terms of service? He had ignored them before, and was forced into a scam where a shady organization took all of his money and possessions. With no other way to provide for his family, the man began selling drugs, which led to several arrests. He has been n prison for 3 years now... His wife has left him for one of the man's close friends

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is Suzie at the bottom of the cliff? Because I pushed her. Knock knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the guy do at the funeral? cry because his wife died

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between contemporary Christian music?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

You know that song "FIrework" by Katy Perry? Well, I ate a hotdog last night.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why Is Helen Keller such a bad driver? Because she is a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Man: You know you're crazy when you talk to inanimate objects, you know you're Insane when they reply. Stick: I know, right?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q) Why are there no aspirin in the jungle? A) Because it would not be financially viable to attempt to sell pharmaceuticals in the largely unpopulated rainforest

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a man walked into a bar and said ow

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what is the difference between a baby and a book... The book still has a spine

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

guess what? WHAT? Idk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

a man walked into a bar today he suffers from depression from his wife leaving him and taking custody of the children on the grounds that he is an alcoholic and is unfit to raise children

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How is a raven like a writing desk? Both have absolutely nothing to do with the other one.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops