Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

cool

I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

What's the worse part about a Jewish man dying in a house fire? It was his birthday

what do you have to do to confuse a blond? Nothing

Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

What's 2+2? Gonorrhea

Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not sure, but the farmer must be very upset about the loss of one of his chickens.

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

What's the difference between a ginger and a brick? Bricks get laid

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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