What's worse than fingering your sister and finding your father's wedding ring ? 3 bee stings.

Why did the lemon eat salt? I DON'T KNOW!!

What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

Why did the Egg turn Purple Because it didnt turn blue.

Why did the young boy fail his math test? Because he had down syndrome.

You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me!

What's Kanye West's main goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

That awkward moment when sentences don't end the way you octopus.

Why wasn't Kevin Love able to draw a perfect circle. Because, he just wasn't able to get the job done

A Lion walked into bar. He ordered a steak Because lions love meat.

"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

Knock Knock Who's There? Betty Betty Who Betty Sue Never heard of ya I'm here from the management. You have a present. I don't care, we don't take kindly to you city folks. But Sir, If you don't take this I will have to ask you to leave. Well what is it. It's your bill. Knock knock Who's there? Cowabunga! Cowabunga Who? Moo Moo alalalalalal woohoo i'm so high

What did the fish say when he hit the wall? A. Dam B. He Charlie I found the wall C. Both Well he didn't say both but he could have said A or B but it wouldn't make sense for him to say both.

What do you a badass who not a badass. Grant Lousbury.

2 muffins are in an oven. One says to the other, "it's really hot in here!" the other replies, "WHOA. A talking muffin!"

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

What is the gay guy thinking about? Penis

What do you call 1 + 1 = 2? i like boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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