Optimus Prime: "GIVE ME YOUR FACE!" Shockwave: "Illogical. I have no face." Optimus Prime: "Then GIVE ME YOUR EYE!" *RIPP*

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What did Hitler say to the black jew? Get to the back of the oven

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Why did the clam not like to share? The deep sea is a competitive environment, where survival of the fittest is prominent.

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Paul walks on a bridge. It collapses.

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Hurricane Sandy should be named A-Rod. Cuz he dosent hit anything

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Why did Timmy fall off his swing? The Holocaust

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Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a PS3? Michael was a succesful dancer, singer-songwriter, musician, and philanthropist, whereas a PS3 is a games console.

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Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To look at the most interesting man in the world.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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whats the difrence between a japaneese and chineese person? one is from japan and one is from china.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

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Which brains do zombie like most? Zombies dont exist.

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Q. What do you call a person with no arms, legs, torso, or head? A. A mutilated corpse.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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Menstrual jokes aren't funny. Period. Neither are 9/11 jokes. Just plane wrong Same with cripple jokes. Can't stand them I don't see why Helen Keller jokes are funny

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust What's worse then the Holocaust? Two Holocausts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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