What do you call John Lennon without glasses? A skeleton, because John Lennon is dead.

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Your mam is so fat.

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of babies and a truck full of bowling balls? You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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Yeah, but why is this honesty so important for you, personal reasons because you are like that, because you consider me a friend? Or because a single lie, could have catastrophical consequences?

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Q.what semtemce is a most used lie by a fourteen year old? A. Yes i agree to the terms of service, and am above the age eighteen.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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What did the girl get for her birthday? the Plan B pill

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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Why did the man die when he hugged the pillow? He was hallucinating at the grand canyon.

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

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Roses are red, violets are blue, pee pee is yellow, poo poo is brown. if not you have a serious disease...

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He--Hey guys

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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What do you call a midget cripple with cerebral palsy? Unfortunate

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nothing

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Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

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What happens if you an 3ft size olive, a glob of red paint and rainbow colored glue on a table and rub your arm in it? You get olive, red paint and glue on your arm.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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