Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

what did one gagged man say to the other gagged man? nothing he was gagged

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

What do you call a remote that does not work? a remote that does not work.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

Why don't men have menstruation? -Because it sucks

What's red bubbly and spins around? A baby in a microwave

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

Connor is homo

What's the same between grapes and squirrels? They're both purple, except for the squirrel.

Why was the man struck by lightning? Josh Mathai was there.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

what is this joke about? - i don't know i am still writing the j

Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

An American, Mexican, and Chinese men are each asked to throw something off a cliff that they have too much of. The Chinese threw off rice. The Mexican threw off tacos. And the Americans.. Well.. They threw off the Mexicans.

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

Why is Michael Jackson bad at checkers? Cause he's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

A black man walks into a bar full of white people. And then... He orders his drink.

Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

Where do you find a dog with no legs ? Same place you left it ...

"Jim would you like to share what you've written?" says rehab counselor "Roses are red, Violets are blue, Heroin is bad, I see sound."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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