What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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Q-Whos the best server at Sonic? A-Kevin !

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a black guy walks into a black bar

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When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

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A guy walks into a bar and says ouch.

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Why was timmy having trouble with his homework? Because lobotomies were a forced practice in the 1950's.

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

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knock,knock whos there? teddybear. teddybear who? a teddybear killed your family.

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What did the cannibal order at McDonalds? Big Mac, extra pickle, hold the mayo.

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Pooring urine into your eyes, is a natural way to cure pink eye. Found this out this morning.

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What did the girl say when she got her period? Nothing, why would she want anyone to know?

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing. The ocean is inanimate and therefore incapable of speech.

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The ability to live the life of a dead person.

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What is useless and over-payed? Our government.

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Why didn't the woman go to the kitchen? She was kidnapped and forced into sex-slavery

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Why did the Smartie get fired from the M&M factory? For throwimg out all the W&Ws

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What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? He called the police.

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What's not funny? Today's anti-joke writers

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Women's Rights.

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Why did the man cross the street? He just wanted to .. i don't see why not, i mean he could have gotten ran over by a train on a road but who knows he could have been run over by a turtle!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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