Why can't Tommy ride a bike? Because Tommy is a goldfish.

What did the one bagpiper say to the other? Nothing, one cannot speak while playing the bagpipes.

Looking for propane accessories? Well look no more!

Why is it that we don't eat clowns? Because in most Western countries cannibalism is illegal.

Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

my great great grandpa ryan the rattlesnake had a cat named dog-

What's the difference between a taxidermist and an astronomer ? They have a different job.

What did Hellen Keller name her dog? Her parents named it Spot; Hellen Keller isn't able to speak due to her handicapped muteness.

An irish man walks out of a bar

A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

Teagan Doherty, stop making jokes, thanks

How fast do Jews cook? It depends how many you have in the oven at once.

You're welcome!

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

Why did the fat man go to America? Because he was excited to get of work for vacation.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its feet are both the same.

My grandpa asked me a very important question right before he kicked the bucket. Grandpa: Son, how far do you think I could kick this bucket?

What's the difference between? Your mom.

Knock knock Who's there? Doorbell repairman

what sad about 4 mexican dieing in a car crash??? My car

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He didn't say anything because ducks can't talk.

How many Jews does it take to fix a gas leak?...

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a terrorist.

How does a girl with no arms swing on the swing? She doesn't, she has no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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