Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

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Roses are blue Violets are red Crap, I already messed up the joke.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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why was the little girl crying? because she was molested

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Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

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"Want to hear a joke? Tough."

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Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

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Two Atheists walk into a bar. A nearby Christian notices this fact and proceeds to slightly preach to both of the Atheists. They then kindly explain that they don't personally believe in God, but respect the Christian's opinion. They all order drinks, and become very close friends, engaging in a long, hateless conversation.

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what did the black guy say to his pregnant wife? im very excited to see our newborn child.

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Person 1 - Have you heard about the movie about constipation? Person 2 - No. Person 1 - It hasn't come out yet

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Kathy Griffin.

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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whats the only concert you can get into for 45 cents? a 50 cent concert featuring Nickelback

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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Knock Knock ... guess nobody's home.

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why does one side of a v-flock of geese have more birds? Because it does.

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What do you call a beagle and an eagle mixed together? A beagle.

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How can you shed 10 pounds in one day? Get your legs amputed.

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How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

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Who were the fastest readers of all time? The victims of 9/11. They went through over 87 stories in less than 2 1/2 minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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