Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

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" Hey you have something on your face. " ( man speaking punches the guy he was talking to ) " It was pain."

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Why did the man tell the other man to shut up? The other man said something that made the man who said shut up mad so he told the man to shut up.

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so little jonny was doing bad in school like always so he decided to drop out and now he cant get a job and will have a terrible life and die alone

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"I can't wait to eat this bagle!" "Yes you can." "Yeah, I guess you're right."

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear made her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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Yo mama is an upstanding member of her community.

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Why'd the girl fall of her scooter? She fell into a hole and died. She was never found again. All that was left was her scooter.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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hipsters

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Women's rights.

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How do you know if there's an elephant in your fridge? The fridge is broken and the elephant has mauled your dog

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If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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Gay's rights

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Norris? well no one knows for certain, but they do know there's alot of fridges involved

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How many one does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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yo mama so fat, she weighs 478 pounds and is in high risk of cardiovascular dieses and/or heart failure.

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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what do you call a fish with no eyes? fsh

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops