What's the most common pickup line in a gay bar? "Hi, may I buy you a drink?"

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Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

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What's the difference between God and Kanye West? God doesn't think he's Kanye West.

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A blonde, a redhead, and Asian are talking. They are friends.

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Pull over dat ass to fat, no seriously your blocking a firelane

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why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms. knock knock. who's there? well, its not suzie.

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How often does a black women poop? Every nine months.

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George Bush does not care about black people.

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So three men walk into a bar. One orders a Miller Light, the other orders a Guiness, and the third has a glass of ice water. He was the designated driver.

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You know how to torture Hellen Keller? -No. Put a plunger in the toilet.

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Hi

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There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

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natalie wilson is a hilarious stripper

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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What did one chimney say to the other chimney. Nothing, chimneys dont talk.

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Why did the mushroom go to the party? Because he was a fungi.

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Hitler was in a shampoo advert that everyone bought Now people must be dying to take a shower

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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother than explains to the daughter the logistics of sex. The daughter seems to comprehend and walk away leaving the mother to cook.

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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Is every Voltorb a terrorist?

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and oranges? With one,you can make a delicous smoothie, but the other is just a pile of citrus fruits.

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Knock Knock Who's there? UPS UPS who? UPS, your package is here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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