What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

8====D {(0)}

hahaha

What is the difference between Terri Schaivo and a basket of rotting vegetables? The rotting vegetables aren't edible.

What did the cat say when it jumped into the cardboard box? Meow

What time is it? 10:58

Whats the definition of helpless? A quadraplegic in a washing machine

What does a ghost get when he watches pornography? A boner

what did the man with no legs get for Christmas? A piano

Why did the kids stop playing tag? Because the boy was "it" was kidnapped and never seen again

Why didn't Sally eat the meatballs The meatballs ate her

Your mother smells so bad that people make comments about it behind her back, and one person mailed her some soap.

Wat do u call a 2 root tall scottidh man named max? Max

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a mammal.

I am a real homosexual

(insert Anti-Joke here)

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

How do you know when a Mexican has died? Well based on the large mass of people inside and outside the funeral home who mostly seem to be of a mexican background and cultue, it would be safe to say that those are his/her friends and family who care deeply about them and therefore you could conclude that a Mexican person probably passed away. It's actually quite sad and going to be a rough few days for those closely connected to the person who died.

Last night I had consensual sex with my long term girlfriend in the missionary position. It lasted approximately 4 minutes before I ejaculated into the durex extra safe condom.

a women picks up her phone and screams! There were 3 missed calls from her mother-inlaw

What's green and has wheels? Grass...I was just lying about the wheels.

What do you call a bunch of balck men running down a hill. A bunch of balck men running down a hill.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have schizophrenia, and don't have any friends

A baby seal walks into a club.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...