What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because grass don't eat meat.

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hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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The Pope walks into a bar, the barman says: "What'll it be, Pope?" But the Pope's knowledge of English is tenuous at best. He mumbles something in Latin that the barman doesn't understand. The Pope becomes frustrated and leaves.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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What type of pants do Mario and Luigi wear? Levi or Denim, I'm not sure why but probably because you can get a nice fitting pair for only a couple of bucks.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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What did the five fingers say to the face? Nothing. Fingers cannot talk.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Why didn't the little boy have a good time at his birthday party? Because his friends lit him on fire.

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Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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Puns are terrible. I love them.

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

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If it's mid-july and there are flying cows everywhere, how many bacons does it take to impregnate a spaghetti ? 3, because because vases can't swim in the dark.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops