What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

What's worse than being dead? Nothing.

there are two muffins in an oven one muffin says "whoa, its hot in here!" the other says nothing, because it is a muffin, and the other muffin, in reality, said nothing either.

Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

why did the boat sink the captain drove it into a pile of sharp rocks

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

A horse and a penguin and a kangaroo come into a bar and order drinks from the bartender, who later gets fired for taking acid while working.

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

What did the black police officer say to the white police officer? We just got a call in. Four dead children were found in an alley behind a mall.

A man walks into a bar, orders a drink, drinks it, and leaves.

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...