What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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A Texan, a Mexican, a Brit and a Frenchman are on a plane that begins having engine trouble. The black box was never found.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I tryed to hang myself But my neck qad to fat

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Huffing glue only becomes a problem when you get stuck on it

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Hey! How do you do a four strand plait? With four strands.

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What's worse than seeing Charlie sheen in a Turkish bath house? Watching the direct tv commercial for the 100th time today

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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Why did the Jewish man bend down to pick up a penny? Because he had dropped it and required the penny as part of his payment for his food.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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why can't johnny compete in the track race? because he has no feet.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? Cause the Nazi told him to

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops