A horse walks in to a bar. The barman says: "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse and can neither speak nor understand English. The horse is startled by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables on it's way out.

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

how to you mess with helen keller? Re-arrange her furniture

i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

What are the differences between a black man and a park bench? One's a chair and ones a person.

Why did the little kid drop his ice cream? ...... Because he was startled by the pedophiles penis being shoved up his ass.

What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

So seriously you have never ever played videogames before?

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

Why did Hellen Keller's dog run away? Because it could see and hear.

Why did the accountant die?A terrorist put a bomb under his desk.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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