A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

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What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

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There once was a man from Nantucket, His dick was so long it caused tremendous physical discomfort, and it was extremely difficult for him to find pants that did not reveal his freakish abnormality, and greatly limited his levels of intimacy. After botched reduction surgery, he was left without a penis at all and, realising the horrible irony, threw himself into a raging river (experiencing no shrinkage whatsoever).

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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your momma is so fat she eats a lot of things

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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Q:Why was 6 afraid of seven? A:Because seven ate (eight) nine

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What do the Africans have for breakfast? Nothing.

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a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

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what do you get when you give a man viagra? A man with an erect penis. Viagra is known to increase blood flow and vascularization in the penis, allowing for erections for people with erectile dysfunction.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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why did the black man shoot himself? because he commited a crime and was sorry for what he had done

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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