Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

Why can't Timmy go on any rollercoasters? Because he's morbidly obese and it would a safety hazard.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

What is funnier then 25 9/11

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

bite me

What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? You can't drown babies in roast beef.

Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

My dog has no nose. How does it smell? It doesn't

Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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