Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

Knock! Knock! Who's there? Russel. Russell who? Russell Johnson. Oh, come in.

Why are humans and squirrels the same? They both live in trees except for the human

One time I said to my friend, "There are too many black people in this country." I forgot he was black.

How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

civil rights

Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

Three fish swim into a bar. The first one says "blub blub blub". The second one says "blub blub blub". The third one says "I'm not a fish I'm a human". What does the bartender say? Answer = Ayy Llmao _George_Bush_

What did the apple say to the grape? Nothing, fruit are incapable of speaking

what did the apple say to the orange? -- NOTHING! APPLES DO NOT TALK!

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

Knock Knock. Come in.

Why couldn't the boy see the pirate movie? Because it was sold out

What is black and hangs on a rope next to a rebel flag in my back yard? A tire swing for my redneck kids to swing on.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she was hit by a refrigerator.

Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

What do you call a black man with a knife and red liquid on his hands? A chef who accidently spilled strawberry jam on himself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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