what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

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One day a baby hit himself on the head with a stuffed animal. I lied, it was a brick, so he died.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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What is lil Wayne's real name? Dwayne micheal carter jr.

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Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

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Why couldn't the old man see the Moon? Because he was blind and it was daytime.

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So a guy gets drunk and walks into a gay bar by accident He then yells I LOVE PENIS!!!!! everyone yells oh yeaaaaaaaaaa

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scraggle is in you pillow case

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Whats 9 plus 10? 19

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Q:Why didn't the Mexican get out of the box? A:Because he liked it in the box.

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How do you make Justin Bieber cry? You take away his marijuana.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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a man walks into a bar with a poodle stuffed halfway up his rectum... WHY ARE YOU WAITING FOR A PUNCHLINE!? MY GOD! THIS MAN HAS A DOG UP HIS ANUS!

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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What does it take to make the best anti-joke ever? not this

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Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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